Commenters and followers.

HELLO!

WELCOME TO DRUNK IN CARDIFF.

Any blogger knows how extraordinarily gratifying it is to know someone is reading yer ramblings and I'm no exception, I've got nine followers now and I love each and every little one of you to the bottom of your no-doubt spotlessly clean cotton socks.

I do try and respond to comments when you leave them, apologies if I don't. I'm very keen to link to other blogs about alcohol, depression and life in Wales as well, so if you have one, drop me an email or a comment. I'll try and follow the example too of one of my new pals - anybeth, who writes Swimming in Clear Water, and stick a post up about 'em, but then as you'll soon learn what I say, with all good intentions - like that Frodo fellah in Lord of the Rings, he really couldn't help putting the ring on could he? And digressively enough, it was interesting to hear in an interview with Andy Circus, who played Gollum/Smeagol that his research into the role largely involved talking to heroin addicts - isn't always what I do.

Maybe I should be a writer.

That title. That's the dream you see. I used to be a journalist and over the last year I've managed to get three (count 'em) commissions for freelance articles but, to be perfectly honest, I haven't been in a very good state at all and pretty much incapable of putting any effort into it. The ever-present laziness doesn't help - is there a pill for this? And, no I don't mean speed.

Anyway. I'm going to try and make a better first of this from now on.

Before I got my job on the newspaper I signed up for a correspondence course in writing - they're called the Writers' Bureau and they advertise quite heavily. I only completed two assignments, but got excellent feedback - more fuel for the I'm a genius I don't have to try to do anything fire that destroys so many of my dreams.

Well, on Tuesday I emailed them and was thrilled to learn that I can simply start up where I left off. I've still got all the course materials so that's another little project to try and keep me busy and it should also be something I enjoy doing.

The, this thing comes easily, sounds terribly egotistical I know. But, it is to an extent true. I'm a terrible talker, and writing is my natural form of communication. I wrote incredibly quickly and easily when I was reporter, but, it must be remembered that everything I wrote was sub-edited and proof read before cast before the lucky old newspaper buyer. Left to my own devices, I just do the first bit and don't bother with the rest. I've sent off articles which are probably absolutely awful, first draft material in need of a hell of a lot of tweaking and very obviously not worthy of publication.

The same is true of this blog - although, I think spontaneity is accepted in this sort of writing - I never read through what I've written, I just spell check it and press publish.

So, that's another thing to try and learn a bit of discipline. I'm going to try and take a bit more care about these posts - please bear in mind that I don't so much build castles in the air as whole civilisations where men live in brotherhood and peace, so we'll see how that goes. I've got an idiot's guide to HTML, and I would like to do more in terms of links and the like.

A real inspiration has come from finding so many other mental health bloggers out there. I was getting a bit disillusioned by the blogosphere having spent far too long gazing, gob open, at right wing and libertarian hate sheets.

The first inspiration was The Secret Diary of A Manic Depressive: it's on my blogroll. The writer is a natural communicator, I'd go further and say an absolutely excellent writer - honest, beautiful prose, thoughtful, moving - and, if she doesn't get a book offer from her blog, well, then publishers are fricking idiots. It is, by the way, quite possible, that publishers are fricking idiots - most other professions are, so I don't see why publishers shouldn't be.

Do have a read of it.

I heard about her blog on Radio4, and through her I've discovered a whole network of bloggers writing about their mental health problems: sometimes they're inspiring, sometimes less so. But, I'm trying to join these networks and any other way I can use to promote this blog (I did warn you I was a hideous egoist - a self hating one, but one nonetheless - I looked up 'the addictive personality' on the internet once, only to find there isn't one (apparently) and what people like me have is a narcissistic personality - makes sense I suppose.)

So, I'm going to try and jazz up my blog a bit, I'm going to try and get back onto my course, and then I'm going to try and start submitting proper freelance stuff and then I'm going to write a novel, radio play or screen play. And then I'll wake up.

We'll see. It's a fine intention and the road to hell is this way.

All the best.

The Cardiff Drunk. I think the plumber's arrived. What joy!